why I didn't make it to work today

Why I didn't make it to work today... a poem

Jumping on my bed
Bouncing on the dead
Dancing to the beats
There’ s a ghost in my sheets
He’ s haunting my pillow heap
So I can’ t go to sleep
The ghost is a scary poltergeist
Even scarier than Jesus Christ
The guy crucified on the cross
Returning as a zombie to show who’ s boss
But this ghost wasn’ t Jesus
Stop making a fuss
He’ s not magic so calm the heck down
He’ s just the ghost of an old clown
Who murdered his family
And chopped them to bits tidily
And was given the electric chair
Which fried off all his hair
And killed him so hard to death
Zapping out all his breath
He’ s in bed trying to haunt me
As plain as you can see
He’ s certainly not fake
And he’ s keeping me awake
So If I don’ t make it in to work tomorrow
Even though I’ d regrettably be filled with sorrow
It’ s because I had a terrible fright
I was haunted all fricking night
It’ s not because of all the beers you see
That may or may not have been drank by me
I’ m not hung over I can safely boast
I’ m skipping work because of the ghost.